Keeping Secrets

Most secrets don’t feel dramatic.
They feel small. Justified. Necessary.

“I don’t want to start a fight.”
“It’s not a big deal.”
“They’d be hurt if they knew.”

But every time you hide something that matters, you place one more brick in an invisible wall between you and your spouse.

At first, it’s barely noticeable.
A thought you don’t share.
A feeling you swallow.
A truth you tuck away.

But over time, that wall grows. And suddenly you’re lying in the same bed, living in the same house… and feeling miles apart.

Here’s the hard truth:
Intimacy can’t grow where parts of you are hidden.
Your partner can only connect with the version of you they’re allowed to see.

And the cost?
Distance. Tension. Loneliness—inside the marriage.

Secrets are meant to be shared.

That is how we get close to people. This is how we become known. This is how we get help.

Action Tip:

Set aside 10 quiet minutes this week and ask each other:

“What’s one small thing I’ve been holding back that I could share to feel closer to you?”

This is not about confessions or blame.
It’s about opening one small door.

Listen without fixing.
Thank each other for the courage to be honest.

Because the goal isn’t a perfect marriage—
it’s a known one.

And that’s where real intimacy begins. ❤️

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